My Sugar Plum Fairy

There is a commercial on TV showing a little cartoon character that is burning the cookies, burning the turkey, trying to untangle Christmas lights, wrap packages, all while Edvard Grieg's Hall of the Mountain King plays in the background and her stress level increases. Until of coarse she is "saved" by the purchase of a Honey Baked Ham! Hmmm, maybe that commercial could end a little differently.

I readjusted my childhood expectations of Christmas, which had stayed relatively intact for years, back in 1985. I grew up with a large family all living in the same city, so Christmas for me was not only the excitement of new toys as a child, but also of visiting Aunts, Uncles, grandparents and cousins on both my mom and dad's sides of the family surrounding the holiday. I still am in awe as to how my parents managed to get us to nearly everyone's home and host nearly everyone at our home, in a matter of two or three days! For a kid, THAT was fun and I felt surrounded by LOVE. And midnight Mass was BIG in our home growing up. Staying up late had that wonderful delicious feeling of adventure, and of coarse, midnight Mass with all the pageantry and beautiful music, fascinated me. It was truly magical and helped gel in my young mind the true meaning of Christmas. My mom's birthday was tucked into all this magic and celebration, and I always thought how special it was to be able to share her birthday with such a festive time of year. It made me feel like the time of year was even more magical.

So as my children grew, I tried to keep some of the magic. We did church and although most of the time my parents and brother would come see us, we had to find our own traditions that didn't include all the visits that I enjoyed as a child. We told our children "the story of Santa" and Santa always brought one special little gift under the tree as a special surprise, with the rest of the gifts clearly being from mom and dad, or a relative or friend. The picture of my oldest, at age 3 captures the joy and excitement of childhood, I am SO glad we were there to get that image. THAT is the quintessential childhood experience that Christmas has the potential of bringing.



So . . . along comes Christmas 1985. My precious, VERY lively youngest child who lay quietly in a big hospital bed with an unknown blood condition, during the "happiest time of the year" caused a huge shift in my head. I had two other small children who I worried about as well, but of coarse everyone's focus was on our little baby who was so very ill. Thankfully the doctors were able to take care of her, but I was forever changed in my thinking of Christmas. We all survived a very different Christmas that year that clearly redefined what a blessing we are to one another, without all the STUFF that comes with the season. I was forever changed.

And so, I have my very own Sugar Plum Fairy, that dances in my head, and makes me smile. I count my blessings EVERY DAY, and feel like it is Christmas, Mother's Day, my birthday and Easter all wrapped up in one each and every day. The love and joy I felt as a child, without the presents, tinsel, shopping and obligations that have come to be attached to the season is my new definition of Christmas. I am so blessed, so lucky, so happy. I have a family and friends that loves me and always manages to make me feel special, and God gave me the ability to look on the bright side, to appreciate, and to know that in the end all will be well. Peace and love and Happy Birthday Jesus.